In an insightful interview with MysticMag, therapist Anjuli Sherin opens up about her profound journey into trauma healing and resilience, ignited by her own therapeutic experiences 25 years ago.
She shares how she learned that sustained joy and empowerment demand active nurturing, far beyond merely healing old wounds, inspiring her to help others cultivate a vibrant sense of aliveness. Through her book Joyous Resilience, Sherin presents a compelling framework contrasting the Cycle of Suffering with the Circle of Resilience, rooted in nurturance, protection, and a connection to something greater.
Her approach, as discussed with MysticMag, highlights how embracing our emotions with compassion can unlock deep freedom and joy, addressing the emotional challenges of our time.
What inspired you to focus on trauma healing and resilience?
My journey toward focusing on trauma, healing, and resilience as a therapist actually began with my own experience as a client, about 25 years ago. During that first decade of personal healing—while I was also training to become a therapist and starting to see clients—I had the privilege of working with many wonderful healers and teachers. I learned a lot about connecting with my feelings and sensations through somatic therapy, identifying my needs, and learning how to communicate them. I did a lot of work around healing childhood traumas—like so many people carry.
At the end of that phase, I noticed something interesting. Even though I felt lighter and had more tools, more choices, and more possibilities, there was this underlying assumption that joy, happiness, creativity, and playfulness would just naturally emerge as a result. But what I began to realize—for myself and for my clients—was that experiencing joy and pleasure in a consistent, sustained way wasn’t automatic. It wasn’t just about having a random fun moment, a travel opportunity, a job promotion, or some external high point.
True, lasting joy—along with pleasure and a sense of play—required its own kind of healing work. It was something to be cultivated, practiced, and actively nurtured. That realization was a turning point for me. It made me want to explore more deeply what creates a sense of joy, and how we can learn to live from that place.
In fact, I’ve come to understand that this connection to joy is the very signature of resilience. When we’re in a resilient state, we’re more and more able to access that sense of joy—and that’s what ultimately drew me to this work.
How does your approach to therapy integrate joy and empowerment?
In my approach to therapy, empowerment and joy go far beyond the common idea of joy as simply a high state of happiness—those fleeting moments of ecstasy or bliss we often see portrayed in popular culture. That version of joy tends to be one-dimensional.
The kind of joy I work with—and help my clients cultivate—is much deeper. It comes from a sense of inner liberation and freedom that arises when we’re able to truly feel and access the full range of our emotions. When we learn how to be with our emotional experiences—with love and acceptance, whether they’re painful or uplifting—we gain real choice in how we respond to life.
This emotional presence creates a profound sense of empowerment. We’re no longer reacting unconsciously or feeling stuck; instead, we become capable of understanding what’s happening within us and making choices that align with what holds heart and meaning for us.
That’s where the real joy comes from—and that’s the kind of empowered, liberated life my therapeutic approach supports and nurtures.
Can you share key insights from your book, “Joyous Resilience”?
Everything I’ve spoken to so far comes together in the model I introduce in Joyous Resilience, which is a two-part framework: the Cycle of Suffering and the Circle of Resilience.
The Cycle of Suffering addresses the emotional pain we often bring into therapy—feelings like anxiety, depression, irritability, procrastination, or anger. These emotions usually come from our most vulnerable self, and while we tend to see them as problems to fix, the real issue lies not in the emotions themselves, but in how we respond to them.
Typically, we respond in two negative ways. First, through criticism—our inner critic might blame us, tell us we’re weak for feeling this way, or compare us unfavorably to others. This voice is often shaped by our upbringing, cultural norms, and larger societal systems. Second, we may respond through neglect—by numbing or avoiding our pain. This can look like compulsive scrolling, binge-watching, shopping, overworking, or turning to substances. Both criticism and neglect deepen our suffering, leading to shame, disconnection, and a shrinking sense of self.
The Circle of Resilience is the antidote. It begins with nurturance—a compassionate, attuned response to our vulnerable parts. This involves meeting ourselves with kindness, understanding, and the commitment to say: “I’m here for you. I want to understand what’s going on.” It’s a transformative way of relating to our pain that helps soothe and heal our emotional wounds.
The next aspect is the Protector and Champion. This is the part of us that helps set boundaries—internally and externally—and takes action in the world. It gives voice to what we need, helps us say “no” where necessary, and encourages us to say “yes” to opportunities that align with our truth. While the nurturer cares for our internal world, the protector/champion supports our external life and decisions.
I also introduce a third element: the Soul Self. This is our connection to something greater than ourselves. It doesn’t have to be religious; it can be a connection to nature, art, music, science, community, or service. It’s the part of us that finds meaning and belonging in the world beyond the personal. The Soul Self offers a sense of purpose and reminds us that we’re not alone.
Together, nurturance, protection, and the Soul Self transform our relationship with our vulnerable self. That’s when vulnerability turns into resilience—not because we “fixed” ourselves, but because we responded with care, strength, and connection. We begin to feel empowered, gain perspective, and access new choices.
And ultimately, this leads us back to joy—not as fleeting happiness, but as a deep sense of aliveness. Joy, in this model, is the freedom to be all of who we are: our anger and our laughter, our sorrow and our playfulness, our solitude and our interconnectedness. The more we embrace our full humanity without shame, the more naturally that sense of joy returns.
What common challenges do you see in emotional well-being today?
What I see more and more is that people’s emotional well-being isn’t just affected by what’s happening in their personal lives—it’s deeply intertwined with larger societal and cultural stressors. For instance, the rise in loneliness, insecurity, and comparison is often fueled by the overuse of social media. It creates a false sense of connection while actually deepening our disconnection from real-life encounters.
We’re living in an increasingly polarized world, where many people feel a persistent sense of lack or unreality. Whether it’s around aging, finding joy, or even just experiencing pleasure, we’ve shifted into an era of watching others live rather than fully inhabiting our own lives. People are observing life more than living it—constantly viewing, consuming, scrolling—rather than engaging in hands-on, present experiences.
On top of that, we’re collectively navigating major stressors: climate change, the lasting effects of the pandemic, political instability, and the ongoing targeting and disenfranchisement of historically oppressed communities. These systemic issues provoke a deep level of anxiety and distress that I’ve seen continue to grow.
Addressing these challenges requires not only personal work—which I often focus on—but also building networks of connection. It’s about joining with others who are working to address the larger institutional and systemic causes of our distress. That’s how we not only care for ourselves, but also take action toward healing our communities and future generations.
It’s also vital that we reclaim creativity, play, and presence. That can be as simple as cooking, gardening, writing a letter by hand, dancing, or sitting together in live groups. These acts help us reconnect with our bodies and the world around us. We need to come out from behind our screens, out of our solitary spaces—especially in the West—and back into community. There’s so much power, healing, and joy in that. And when we’re in community, we also tap into a collective power that allows us to drive meaningful change. That, I believe, is one of the most powerful antidotes to helplessness.
What simple practices can people incorporate into their daily lives for resilience?
To recap some of what I’ve shared so far—and returning to the model I often reference—one of the most fundamental practices is self-nurturance. A simple and powerful place to start is incorporating some form of loving-kindness or compassion-based meditation or affirmations. This allows you to become aware of your inner voice and begin to cultivate a kinder, more compassionate, and attentive inner dialogue.
Alongside that, I always recommend journaling. It doesn’t have to take long—just a few minutes a day can help you release what your heart is holding and listen inward. Whether through writing, meditation, or even a mindful walk, the goal is to pay attention to yourself gently and kindly. In the case of walking—especially outdoors—you also get the benefit of tuning into something larger, like nature. There’s a beautiful kind of resilience and inspiration we can draw from the natural world, and it can shift your mood in profound ways.
So, daily practices like loving-kindness meditation, reflective journaling, movement, mindful walking, and spending time in nature are deeply grounding and nourishing.
Additionally, I encourage people to seek out community—not online, but in person. Find a group or an activity that uplifts you, whether it’s a creative hobby, cooking together, making art, volunteering, or even activism. These shared experiences create a sense of connection, creativity, and joy. When we create something with others, we remember the power of community and the joy of collaboration.
And lastly, it’s about finding what brings you alive. Resilience is not just about enduring hardship; it’s also about returning to what gives you joy and meaning. Often, that joy comes not from what we accumulate, but from what we experience: the beauty right outside our door, the love of those close to us, and the fulfillment of giving and using our gifts. And perhaps most importantly, making space to rest. Resting—truly resting—with a loving inner voice is one of the greatest gifts we can offer ourselves and those around us, especially in the midst of such stressful global and personal times.
Find out more at: www.anjulisherinmft.com
